While looking on-line for the meaning that the month of April holds, what caught my attention most was that this month is about “opening”: opening up; blooming; growing. What a great thought. I am a firm believer that each of us always has areas or ways we could use to grow; open up more; live more fully. So what would that be for you? This is as good as any time to ponder this question. It could be you need to open yourself up more to accepting current changes that are occurring in your life. Or maybe it is about opening up to new and different relationships. Possible you are on a spiritual journey that is asking you to open yourself to new ways of thinking and believing. Could it be that you need to accept your full value and worth? Sometimes it seems like resisting is easier than opening up.
Whatever your personal situation is, ask yourself what is keeping you from fully opening yourself up? My guess is that it is in some way a form of fear. It could be fear of the unknown; fear of failure; fear of being hurt. Doubt is just another form of fear. Fear of change. Even when you know the change is good for you, it still means to be different than where you are now and that can produce fear. Fear is a powerful force in one’s life; sadly, often holding you back. There is the well know quote “feel the fear and do it anyway.” Sometimes that seems easier said than done.
What would help you “feel the fear and do it anyway”? Can you think of a time in the past when you faced a fear and survived; even benefited? It can help to look back on pass successes to remind yourself that you have done this before and it was worth the risk. Make a list of as many times in the past that you can think of that you have faced a change and the results were positive. Then design a few affirmations about these truths of your past successes.
Another tool that can help you with being more open to growing and walking through the fear you have is to guard your thoughts. Stop giving so much attention to all your worries. The more you focus on the negative, the more the negative will consume you. So while there may be some risk in change, focus on the other side of the coin, or what is called “reframing”. In my book I call it “correcting” your thoughts. Write down the thoughts you want to focus on and be on purpose about replacing the fearful ones with these other truths that you want in the forefront of your mind. Your thoughts are powerful agents of change. You can choose to focus on thoughts that will be more productive for you.
In short, take responsibility for what life is bringing your way. Take responsibility for being what I call “the active director” in your life. I understand how difficult life can be. Even in those times you have choices on how to respond. You do have some control over yourself. Maybe not over anyone else, but, yes, you can learn to better direct your life. Pay attention to ways life is asking you to open up. Listen. Be on purpose about becoming the best you can be in this lifetime. Not perfect; but the best you!!!
Deborah Day M.A. Blog 